it makes me think

setiap ngomongin dia, gue jadi mikir. gue takut. seorang dia yang sepintas mata merupakan the sheer picture of perfection. seorang dia yang ajegile le ajegile cakep bener. fans bertebaran. kemanapun dia berjalan pasti aja ada kenalan.

cuma begitu dalemnya terkuak, seorang dia langsung jadi, ehm apa ya, orang biasa.
orang biasa yang setiap tindakannya di-swt-in, yang setiap gerakannya di-cuih-in, yang setiap omongannya di-ceng-in.
dan mendadak, seorang dia ga lagi sempurna di mata orang.

lama lama, gue iba. ngeliat usahanya bertahun tahun (mungkin malah dari lahir -,-) untuk menebar pesonanya dan menambah teman (pengagum) mulai rontok. padahal dia sudah (berusaha) memasuki semua golongan yang ada.

tapi makin kesini, yang bikin gue pun jadi nyesek adalah, dia yang se-wah itu, menjadi object di percakapan-percakapan seperti berikut,

" eh, tadi gue liat loh ekspresi lo pas lo ngeliat *** lagi ***, kayaknya lo sama aja nih sama gue "

" yaelah, lo baru ya ga suka nya? gue mah udah tau dia kayak gitu dari lama "

" dulu, dia ngomong apa gue dengerin. sekarang, BACOT "

" ya Allah, rempong bener dah jadi orang "

" demi apa lo juga ga suka sama dia? GUE JUGAAAA! yaampun, kirain gue doang "

dan gue pun iba. bener bener iba.

it makes me think, that the thing you should worry isn't moments when you're at the lowest part of the wheel. you seriously gotta worry about moments when your at the top. because once you're on top, everyone's glancing on you. they all stare at your stuffs, whether its the good one, or those times you mess. someone can love you deeply, others can feel a jolt of disgust just by watching you enter the room.

PS :
people says that i consider you as my Nemesis. no, i'm not. first, i dont care that much about you. second, i kinda pity you. but, to be honest with you, if someone sees you for the first time, and they like you, i kinda get it. because i like you the first time i saw you. and million more glances, i still like you. but what you messed with is very sacred. and that, my friend, is stamping a big NO sign upon a picture of you in my head.

if you wanna know what is it, its more important (to me) than simple stuffs others feel for you. no, i dont despise you because of your speech, act, style, disloyalty, betrayal, et cetera. i just simply hate your work ethics. and its not that simple, to me.

tapi sekarang, setelah gue liat lo, gue jadi iba, dan kayaknya, gue mulai membiarkan lo. i dont want to make you becoming more pathetic.